I have come to accept a characteristic of mine that I tend to get excited about things very quickly from the get go..and then sort of lose interest. That might not be the right word for it, but I've wanted to sit down and blog for the past couple of weeks..but always felt that all the things that are rolling around in my mind just weren't ready to come out just yet. And maybe they still aren't..but then I also ask myself "will they ever be?"
This past Friday I had a wonderful coffee date with my lovey Britt, and a quick coffee turned into a three hour life reflection about school, family, and being a 20something growing woman. After our last sips of coffee had long gone cold and we were still talking I felt an exhale of relief sort of wash over me. I had been able to babble on about the things that had been bugging me to someone that I know would understand, and they not only accepted it, but were able to level with me and understand where I was coming from. (Thank you by the way Britt :) I cannot wait till we do it again!)
Still..even though I felt great as I went about the rest of my day, I still go back and forth on the things that are in the back of my mind and really should be more in the foreground. Not that I am anywhere near making a decision at the moment about this situation (I know you're all dieing to know what exactly it is :P) but maybe I go about making decisions in my life the same way I get excited about new things?! Maybe the fact that this year has literally opened a horizon of possibilites for me has also sort of overwhelmed me. And it could be possible that I am simply excited about this new sense of direction, that I don't feel trapped on one road or stuck with one career choice, identity, or at the end of the day, one decision. Don't the smallest decisions have the biggest impact on us?
Either I am experiencing a strange case of writer's block..or maybe I'm simply not ready to fully think aloud about what is going on at the moment. My hesitation about choosing my every word that I type and my biting of my lower lip tells me that I might just have to leave it at that for now. If you took the time to read over my senseless babble I apologize for boring you to death for the last ten minutes. But maybe you have your own thoughts on this random vomit of words, but I think this blog was just that..a vomit of words that desperately needed out..and might help me in finding clearity on the decision that lies ahead. Stay tuned!